It in 100-th time has asked itself(himself) this question: what to do, if... If 
The woman whom you idolised, has appeared through false, hypocritical, 
The empty, vainglorious, near bourgeois. If you were betrayed by people, which 
You considered as close friends and trusted what and mother you will not always entrust. 
If envious persons and enemies have ruined your career. If all over the world does not remain 
Any live beings to which you would be necessary – you, instead of 
Your services, your money, your favour or your labour... 
He, of course, knew the answer: to get a dog. But its this answer for some reason not 
Arranged. 
        From time to time it would like to raise a howl, and it did by times it – in night 
The sky or in a ceiling of the apartment, on the moon or on a lamp shade of the fixture, 
Dividing with it a decaying hell of a sleeplessness. It deafly groaned, grieving for that, 
That it was unworthy even an easy regret, let alone verses, which 
He wrote to it. Them it only has much amused cheap vanity rather 
The limited woman. To it followed know earlier: the woman who has betrayed once, 
Will betray both the second, and the third, and the tenth... 
        It was simply naive. He thought, that it required its love and 
To care. And unless he did not hear very long time ago: «My God, protect me from friends, 
And with enemies I somehow will consult itself »? Nevertheless it had a will. It 
Behaved in shape and was not going to to become an inveterate drunkard. He knew, that suicide – 
It actually an exit for the strong. And it kept up to the end. 
        However, the end was not far off. It has lost job, money and kind 
Name. It has come to be on the very brink of a precipice, in which sooner or later 
There are everything, but one fall there, having soiled dung trousers, and others is soft 
Plan on in advance got angelic wings. 
        It had enough mind to become face to face with the pain. It held in 
Hands the broken heart, he saw the broken life in a coffin. It has locked 
Itself(himself) in a labyrinth consisting of one deadlocks, he dragged in the body 
Numb soul, and at it does not remain to time to grow up an artificial limb. It 
Has told to itself: «it is fine. Torture yet has not ended. I the weakling, I dung, I 
The loser. Here my suffering, here my shame, here my sins, here all mine 
Fatal mistakes. Are burnt out in a brain, as a brand on cattle. With it it is possible 
To live further? If yes, live, a damned slug, and drink from the damnation. 
If is not present, tidy up me, destiny. Today ». 
        With this pray it left on night street. It has left behind the house, 
With which it is not necessary and to be excused. It moved to find this silent 
To bough destiny which informs on itself muffled signs from the alphabet 
Deaf-mutes, and then udovletvorenno looks at, how the next fool, 
Looked through a sign, writhes in agonal torments. 
        The destiny did not come across to it. It has not appeared among bandits, 
Waiting in a dark lane of a sacrificial lamb. It did not sit in the black 
To the car with the drunk driver, rushing on streets with speed of a penalty dominical. 
She, this stinker destiny, has not found time even to turn back any 
zanjuhannym "accident" in absolutely lazhovoj to game in the night 
"Cats-mouses". 
        Knife. Eventually it could become a simple knife in a hand 
bezbashennogo the moron. A knife which that night has been obliged to find to itself 
Flesh for penetration. 
        Yes, it the present stinker. It escapes, when wish to meet 
From it face to face, she by all means wishes to catch up, beat on launch; during the moment 
Your euphoria and pardonable forgetfulness she likes to joke in inherent in it 
Style: unostentatiously to pat behind shoulder and to put to you under a nose of the 
Joker. 
        The one whom it resembling has crushed and has already forgotten, vainly tried to find 
It again. It from those smart whores who give only once, forcing 
For the rest of the life deafly to grieve about this unique time, being content 
Vague sex with career, success, glory and thoughts on the posthumous 
To silence. 
        Wandering on a city, he has become exhausted. The water of the river bearing in 
Stars, flew under it, not bringing a consolation. His eyes were black with despair. 
It razinutyj the mouth was black from mute shout. In its brain the old rotated 
Plate: treachery, change, loneliness, forlornness, abandonment, 
Emptiness, cold – in a word, a life. In this set did not suffice only 
Death. 
        But it has met it soon. In a bar under the name «life Water», 
Where its icy cold at dawn has tired out. The bar has been opened round the clock. Probably, 
All similar institutions the death through figureheads, for unless owned 
Presently it would not look ridiculously, driving about astride a game on markets 
And threatening with a finger to the numerous clients? No, those wild customs have sunk in 
The past, and now at it is civilised cosy corners: pleasant music, 
Soft light, alcoholic nimbuses, veils of a cigarette smoke, whisper of the old 
Girls... 
        He has left and a half cash and has retired with a bottle to the distant 
To corner. He a little that noticed round itself(himself), concentrated to the internal 
Pulsations. The pain pulsed, as a live being, the parasite who has lodged in 
Stomach. A crimson rhythm. A storm in the asphalt sea. Shouts of deep-water fishes 
Tormented its hearing. Phantoms whipped it on the person steel palms. It 
Escaped from own shade, being surprised with that it becomes more and more and 
More, inflates, steals its meat, pumps over in itself its blood, 
Sucks in its thoughts: he already saw they be wandering fires over bog 
Own close madness... 
        He has drunk half of bottle, but it became easier not. Only sparks 
Flickered along the edges of subjects, reminding that all this world should 
To burn down, when the devil will prepare for itself a fried phoenix. 
        The derelict fell on a bottom. More and more booming there were sounds. Someone 
Periodically changed water and small fishes in this aquarium. Behind the next little table 
Some time the fat catfish stuck out. Then it somewhere was gone. There was a couple 
Gold small fishes. Was yes splyla. And a cancer-eremite prikovyljal here, and then 
Has dragged further the tresnutuju a bowl. Snails. Snails left everywhere 
Mucous traces... 
        He has drunk more than ever earlier. In a bar there was a strange 
The person – the bearded old man in a suit from a fire-resistant material. He has put 
Before the derelict a writing-book on which cover it has been written: «Complaints. 
Offers ». The person who was left by destiny, has opened a writing-book and has read 
Last record: «I Want, that all somewhat quicker a game...». It has sent the bearded 
The old man far away, and that has left, having apologised for the given trouble. 
        And here, after on his eyes tears were once again screwed 
And it has brushed away their palm, he has seen before itself(himself) the woman: bluish-black hair 
And the eyes full of love. 
        – All the same you will be mine, – she has told a deep voice, from 
Of which has jammed at it in a breast is there was a voice of his mother. – but I 
Agree to wait. 
        – Long? 
        – Yes though fifty years. 
        – To me enough this night. 
        – Whereas there about last desire? 
        He has grinned: 
        – Probably, it is a high time to read «the Book dead». 
        – And, throw. Books – a pity consolation for those who is not able to live, 
To die. 
        – Means, and for me too. 
        – But now after all to you not to books, correctly? 
        Yes, it was right. At the sight of books he tested disappointment, as 
At conversation with the person from whom waited much bigger, than that could 
To give. 
        – Then remove from me this pain. 
        – That you know about a pain, a small slug! – she has told 
Contemptiously. – you sit here and you regret yourself, the snotty idiot. Unless you 
Burnt alive on a fire? Or, maybe, you died with the unwrapped 
Stomach in the field of fight? Or you were worn by a pettiness when you dragged the cross 
Upwards on road? And can, you died in the sunk submarine – so 
Long, what has preferred peregryzt to itself veins?. You have not tried to kill at all 
Anybody from the creatures who have destroyed you. 
        What could he mind? Anything. It was right. But from it to it not 
It became easier. It toshnilo from disgust for everything, for all and in the first 
Turn to itself. 
        – I will make everything, that you will tell. – he did not begin to speak about that, 
What award (or a tip?) would like to receive for the fidelity. And so was 
Clearly. She saw it through. 
        – I unique who knows about a pain something definitive, – have told 
It, and for some reason in her lips it has not sounded self-confidently. – after all I can 
To stop any pain. A pain – life water. Once it will cease to flow... 
        He has peered at its beautiful face and has suddenly seen through a skin 
The charred skull. Only for an instant. During this instant he has suspected, that 
Talks to a shade. Or a combination of shades. And these magic eyes – all 
Only game of lantern light on crystals of the hoarfrost covering a windowpane. 
        – Yes-yes, I after all still was not present here, road, – it has made a purring sound with 
Aspiration. – I always in the future. Somewhere near to in vain postponed 
Money, dreams, repentance and love. And good manners. And then I 
I become the present – and the future disappears. Extremely simply... 
        And again it was right. He has imagined, that it (but not this most 
Voice) now hear, except it, some more millions persons on all 
To the Earth. And everyone sees that person who answers its representations about 
The future – kept away or close, but in any case inevitable. 
        – To learn you to live rather late, and here to die... Well, give ive 
Let's try. To begin with we will dance. 
        – Last time? 
        – By itself, last time. Another will not be. 
        At this moment the barman has added loudness, and words of a song became audible, 
Sounding by radio. The person sitting opposite to the dark-haired beauty, only 
Has now noticed, that music plays, and has understood, that music played and earlier. 
Walls of this refuge consisted not only of a brick, but also from silent music, 
The devourer-night not starting up inside sounds. And that it is silent and with pleasure 
Crackled, picking bones of those to whom has carried less... 
        They have risen. They softly moved on a floor from a cold stone. They were 
Together and still on distance, as if the king doomed to loss and 
Unique pawn covering it. In a head of the man the thought has flashed: 
«What line! This dance – simply foolish symbol». Then all thoughts 
Have disappeared. It rearranged feet as if fell from one hole in another – at it 
There was no choice. It conducted it, it reserved music, she played with it, when 
The hair similar to wings of a raven, concerned his faces and covered with a shade, in 
As which he started to feel a cool and a satisfying. And something else hinting on 
Oblivion possibility... 
        Having returned for a little table, it any more was not drunk. He felt 
The person who has gone to a way as if the bar has appeared the train car, on 
Which it took an one way ticket. And consequently him at all has not surprised, 
When the train has got under way.